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Border Patrol Agent murdered

Last month David “Chris” Maland, 44, U.S. Border Patrol Agent and a Veteran, was murdered in the line of duty in Northern Vermont. Last week was the Chinese lunar new year. Time for story in David’s honor and memory.

In the summer of 2011 (or 2012?) I was driving to a monthly drill weekend. A perfect Adirondack summer day: sunny, no wind, about 70 degrees, no humidity. My commander allowed me to skip the morning formation to take care of some personal stuff. So there I was on an awesome day driving my 1992 Geo Metro (3 cylinder, 1 liter motor. Not much more than a go-kart with turn signals) on state Route 3 going west. Around the town of Fine, there was a road block set up by the “little green men” (Federal Border Patrol agents, just like Agent Maland). I observed the agents were in a small group about 15 feet to the left of the car stopped in front of me. Just one single border patrol guy was at the car’s window talking to the driver. Then I noticed that one border patrol guy talking looked Asian. To my untrained eye he appeared ethnic Chinese. Intrigued, I leaned my head out and strained to listen. I could hear the Asian border patrol’s accent but could not make out his words. I suspected his comrades were letting him build up confidence talking to people in English if that was not his first language.

The car ahead of me drove away. I was next. “Hello. How are you? Are you American citizen?” he said in his accented English (or something like that. I don’t remember his exact words). I ignored his question and replied in Mandarin Chinese (The national language of China) that his boss was fat, lazy, stupid, bald American idiot … and more. I added some pointed comments about his boss’s body parts that can not be printed here. I even used the derogatory term for white folks in Chinese to describe his boss. I have no idea who his boss was, I was just winging it. I don’t know Mandarin (Chinese), only enough foul language to get my self into trouble. Thrown off balance, the agent asked “Are you talking to me in Chinese??.” I replied in Mandarin “Yes. Can you speak it?” He answered “Of course I can!”

Another Border Patrol member (the boss?) had walked over to us and asked the agent in an alarmed voice “What did he say to you?!” The agent replied “Ooooo. I can not tell you!” while looking away and shaking his hand side to side. Really annoyed, the boss turned to me (sitting there, in my car, in my army uniform) and asked angrily “What the [bleep] [bleep] did you say to him?!” I replied slowly in my calmest, smoothest voice “Thank you for your service … You’re an American hero”. The “boss,” if I remember correctly, was bald, stocky, had a wee bit of a beer belly and goatee. He seemed momentarily confused. He took a while to respond. “Get the [bleep] [bleep] [bleeping] out of here!” he barked. I smiled and laughed. I pointed down the road, state Route 3, towards Watertown. “Is this the way to Glynco?” (Glynco, Georgia is the United States Federal Law Enforcement Training Center). He was not taking the bait. “Get out here NOW or I will [bleep-ing] arrest you!!”. Given the “boss” used the F-bomb so liberally, he probably was ex-military.

I don’t know if they get free Wi-Fi in heaven. If they do, I hope Agent Maland read this on-line and had a laugh. You are not forgotten.

Stock Car Racing (later evolving into NASCAR) was born from Border Patrol, State Troopers and others chasing illegal bootleggers 100 years ago. These chases occurred in Appalachia, here in northern New York (booze smuggled from Canada) and other places. Federal Law Enforcement has a long and interesting history in The northern Adirondacks, especially since Bloomingdale was the only place in America that Federal Law Enforcement agents refused to venture into during the mid-1800’s … for good reason …

Just a thought.

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