I had an interesting conversation with a friend. It pertained to an article I had read about a young family traveling with children. The parents had passed out a goody bag to all the airplane passengers with candy, earplugs, and a note stating how they hoped their young child wouldn’t be too much of a bother to anyone on the plane. The parents note continued to explain that the child had never flown before and will possibly cry.

My friend thought that the act was so considerate and thoughtful. I disagree — I thought it was ridiculous. I understand the motivation, but I think the pressure for parents to apologize for normal human reactions is extreme. (I am not condoning parents who feel that their children can act any way they want including on a plane, at a restaurant or at home.) My friend defended her response. She is single, no children and travels frequently for business. Yes, the parents were making a kind gesture. It was a kind gesture, I am not denying that. I just thought it unnecessary. My friend has been on planes with parents who have allowed their children to yell and scream. I have also been on planes where parents have done everything in their power to stop their children from screaming. The world is filled with all sorts of people.

I believe the focus shouldn’t be on the parents every time. A person may not be a parent, but at some stage of life, every person has been a child. Everyone has been bored, acted out or cried as an infant and child. Every person has thrown a temper tantrum (some people even as adults). Seriously: raise your hand if you’ve ever been an infant. I see you over there, thinking this doesn’t pertain to you.

A plane is essentially a giant bus in the sky unless you fly first class. People are crammed together, mixing viruses and perfume in abundance. It is part of the risk. Unless you have a private jet, the perfect mixture of passengers is nonexistent. It’s a game of chance. I’ve never assumed that my ticket price includes peace and quiet. When it does, I am grateful, but if it does not, that’s alright.

I believe most parents try to manage their children. There will always be exceptions and those are the people we remember — yes, I’m talking about the person who let their child drop Cheerios into my hair while standing on the tray behind my seat. This philosophy pertains to every public place. But most parents try to soothe their children whether in a restaurant, public transportation or plane.

My advice is the next time a child is crying or acting out, don’t look for a bag of candy to ease your spirits. Try to keep in mind that you used to be an infant too. On a side note, I applaud parents who have time to put goody bags together for an entire plane. When I traveled with my young children, I had enough to do to make sure I remembered to pack my own clothes. If I’d had the wherewithal when my children were young, I would have passed out a note that read, “If our children cry during flight, volunteers are accepted to attempt other safe childcare practices after we’ve exhausted all usual methods. Please feel free to apply your previous knowledge of being an infant.”

Diane Chase is the author of the “Adirondack Family Activities” guidebook series, “Adirondack Family Time: Your Four-Season Guide to Over 300 Activities.” For more family-friendly activities go to www.adirondackfamilytime.com.