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The Real Texas Miracle

September 21, 2011 - John Stack
There is a saying, ‘not all conservatives are stupid, but all stupid people are conservative’ . Not sure how true this is, but really, how else do you explain Rick Perry and Michele Bachmann? I mean really, what intelligent person who vote for these two yahoo? You can vote for Ron Paul, a Jon Huntsman or a Mitt Romney with a straight face. How do you intelligently explain a vote for Perry?

Maybe its Perry’s anti-government stance. You know, shrinking state workforce, not relying upon Federal money. Not like those socialist staes like New York which is…shedding state workers while Texas…is hiring more state workers. OK, maybe a bad analogy. Lets try something else. Maybe he thinks the Federal government should shed jobs! Except without the influx of over 200,000 federal jobs into Texas, there would be a net job loss in Texas. Must be something else to this small government thing..How about fewer regulations! Yeah! He wants to make abortions illegal…by passing more government laws that intrude into personal lives..hmmm. OK. He is definitely against ObamaCare and the mandate that the Federal government is making people BUY insurance because they ‘need’ to be helped because they aren’t smart enough to get insurance themselves. Right Rick! Typical nanny State Liberals! Out forcing people to get stuff by mandate, rather than by choice. Heck, if people don’t want to be inoculated against HPV the federal government shouldn’t be forcing them too. Wait. Whats that’s Slats? Perry wants to force 6th grade girls to be inoculated because the parents don’t know whats best for them so the state better? Thanks Grobnick. I must have forgotten that.

It must be his de-regulation stance. Pery needs to stand with Michele Bachmann on lessening regulations on industry, especially food manufacturers. I mean, when’s the last time there was an e-coli breakout that actually hurt someone?..Wait. What is it now Slats? There were large recalls of peanuts, eggs and other food products in the last year that did actually kill a number of people? Ok, maybe not THAT regulation. How about less government regulation in the home mortgage industry. We need to loosen the reains of the banks so they can make money and loan money to people. In this economic housing crisis we need less regulations, not more.” What now Grobnik? Drinking too much of that Polish beer? Oh. Texas was hit less hard by the housing crisis than just about every other state?” Maybe it has to do with that pro-banking sentiment in Texas! Yeah. “Whats that Slats? Texas regulates mortgages more in Texas than anywhere else? People can’t get home equity loans above 80 percent and basically this is why Texas didn’t have such a housing boom and then housing crash like the rest of the country? Based almost solely upon old lending regulations? Hmm. Must be some other logical reason people are boosting Perry.

Well, Perry must be a compassionate conservative though. He even said on the debate the other night we should be trying to save lives, not kill them. Yeah Slats, he has led the nation in executions by a large margin since he got into office, but that’s different. Being that he cared so much about the health of women with his HPV executive order, he must feel strong about health care. Huh. You don’t say. Highest percent of uninsured children in the US? Highest uninsured rate in nation? Highest insurance rates in nation? Top 2 in percent of people starving? Lowest percent of women receiving pre-natal care in nation? Lowest in coutry in school completion percent. Ok Ok. Maybe we should try something else.

He is a man of conviction! Yes! That’s it! He is convinced that abstinence only education is the best method even though Texas leads the nation in highest percent of teenage pregnancies and repeat teenage pregnancies! Stays true to his convictions even when faced with undeniable facts to the contrary! If you don’t stand for something, you’ll fall for anything!Wait, this is off topic, as we are trying to discern why an INTELLIGENT person who vote for him, not who would vote for someone who ignore facts and stays ideological.

Then it must be that he stands for science and facts and integrity. Like his belief that Intelligent Design is a good scientific alternative to evolution. Or that climate change is just a small group of scientists that stand to benefit from being ‘alarmists’.

Maybe its because Perry is a ‘Real American’…Except when he advocates for secession, which actually makes him treasonous (Kinda like The Winker’s hubby)

Oh, never mind. Slats let me have some of that beer. Maybe that saying WAS right…and the real miracle is that ANYONE would actually vote for Perry…


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